1. |
Lifespan
02:50
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i’m getting scared
summer’s almost over
i chase the sun across the sky
it’s never fair
ascending down the shoulder
there’s nowhere left for me to hide
floating down a lonely road
it’s all i know
the desert in the distance is my home
forevermore
you tried to burn down
the diary i lived in
the only proof that i exist
i guess i’d rather live inside your lungs
it’s cold out here
the pages left were stained with tears that sang:
“i wish i had a longer life
it’s halfway gone
i wish i didn’t sleep so long”
AhhhhhwooooOOOOOOOOooooooooooo
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2. |
Things That I Am Not
03:53
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am I worth anything?
Well that depends on who you ask
lover put me on a shelf
stuck a pricetag on my head
lover put me on a shelf
and I’ll stay there ‘til I’m
dead
don’t you fall in love
with all the things that I am not
i’ll be your cardiac arrest
that just hasn’t happened yet
feeling like a puppet
with your hands inside of me
if I had to bet some $$$
that’s all I’ll ever be
there’s a candle flame
sitting in the pouring rain
i met a dying child
who had a bigger brighter smile
there’s a homeless man
on the median
i hear a robin sing
through a hurricane
when the sun descends
it rises up again
why can’t i get out of bed
without the help of my mother
and expensive kick-ass meds
baby in a basket
floating down a steady stream
if I could be anybody
that’s who i’d want to be
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3. |
Adolescence
04:14
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somewhere in the distance
I saw you soaring high above the bridge
and the sand underneath my sneakers
fell like an hourglass
suddenly i’m under your command
we build a little homestead
where your picture hangs on walls inside my head
i imagined a fire that burned so bright
it kept my baby warm
but the body that I hold is always cold
and the rest of both our lifetimes is
unknown
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4. |
Kisser
03:29
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kiss her in the morning
so that nothing changes
when you walk out of the room
why you gotta leave so soon?
waving in the driveway
with a bottle of wine
for a drunken afternoon
what the hell am I supposed to do?
when the spine begins to thin
embrace that bitter end
kiss her in the evening
when you’re barely conscious
as the flatline starts to beep
i die with every silence in between
now i’m flying like a bird
with a broken wing
for the comfort of the south
but i barely made it off the ground
sometimes you leave
but you don’t come back
the same
would you turn another page
if you knew you’d go insane?
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5. |
Naoko
04:15
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oh Midori
where’d you run away this time?
i swore it was a joke before but
now you’re gone and
won’t return my calls
i’m gonna look for the girl with the purple eyes
so we can disappear along a
magic mountainside
oh Naoko
blind and sleeping under willow trees
she spent an adolescence in a corner
crying dog got kicked one time too much
and in the summer sitting still
still shivering as if the air she breathed
was a Norwegian winter wind
we watched a fire start
the last time that you played
that little red guitar
and sang you’d weave a long beautiful scarf
but you have no thread
a poem but you have no pen
you have nothing left to give
out of luck we locked out listless lips
just want to walk away from this
we were seventeen
the last time that you wrote a shitty melody
and said we had a long amazing
life ahead of us
but now we’re dead to us
another dozen years too late
i smile because it’s just so strange
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6. |
llover
04:40
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slide like silver sand that fills
all the space behind your breath
dancing by the windowsill
like the dust above our beds
love is just a summer sea in drowning me
we catch each other’s colds
in a bed of snow
if i lie still enough
someone might peel me up
between the pages of a book
still got me shivering
your lips and fingertips
but this was written far to well to end
in anything except
a phone call on a rainy day
lovers on a winding road
stopped to help a baby bird
cradled on the shoulder
they were closer than they ever were
sometimes i try to laugh
but ever since the crash
it’s a pill that i can’t pass
because i don’t know why
but it was you and
who were the lovers
getting hosed off of the road that Saturday
kissing you reminds me that someday i’ll die
when we melted in each other’s arms I didn’t mind
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7. |
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when you’re trudging through
the afternoons that drag like anchors
on the ocean floor
do I cross you mind?
I can see you there
with your tangled hair as you
fill me up with that empty stare
that turned boys to dust
well I remember you chasing planes
as they flew above our heads
i watched you fall in love
with people you never met
that’s when i felt the distance grow
before you packed your things and left
like i was loving you from behind
a barb wire fence
you were so good at settling the storm
that’s always raging in my head
how the clouds of thunder rolled away
with every word you said
do you drive all night
soaked in silver light
on a twisting road
thinking life’s a great big maze
you won’t escape?
when the sleeping pills
make your body still
sing you lullabies
like I used to do my love
is it the same?
does it matter either way?
well i remember the foreign maps
that you pinned above your bed
you swore you felt at home
in places you’ve never been
that’s when i felt you disappear
before you packed your things and left
like i was loving you in a fading photograph
you were so good at pulling me apart
until you couldn’t patch me up again
feels like each time i looked into your eyes
a part of me didn’t make it back
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8. |
Sunday Mourning
05:22
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you will never be alive
just like you are today
you’ll never miss the way
your mother kisses you
on a sunny day
in the afternoon
and i sink into the soil
like a puzzle piece
and i’m stuck under the mud
until the thunderstorm
finally swallows me
leaves us all alone
and i sit up on a cliff
out by the endless blue
and i looked out at the ocean
and i said one day
i’ll be a part of you
give me a tidal wave
for now it’s just a cloudy sunday morning
and all the rain and tears are pouring
on the soil
it’s overwhelming
the sea’s unbroken swelling
the undertow is melting
everything into nothing
there’s not a place I’ve wanted to return
no bridge I haven’t burned
no lesson that i’ve ever learned
just yet
i packed my life into a box
and drove away from you
but then suddenly the world
looked so beautiful
from the rearview
it wasn’t there before
i swear
now i’m standing on an overpass so dimly lit
do you ever wish that death could drive a limousine
and help you out of this?
do i just have to plead?
life is a question
I don’t want the answer
the only thing i’ve gathered
is pictures in a broken frame
there’s not a day i ever truly want to
last a little longer
someone’s putting water in my veins
it’s gonna drown away my flame
do you remember when the world
was a cardboard house?
now they’re sitting on a curb
getting soaking wet
they’re full of emptiness
i held your hand that night and wept
still feels like years and years ago
i guess by now those tears have crept
through the floor
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9. |
Balancing Act
04:29
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walking down the street on the first day of autumn
a chill against my lips
there's a bitter breeze creeping slowly upon us
where did it begin?
summer's disappeared until next year
there's a tantrum child holding onto his mother
screaming at the sky
she just smiles and speaks with such a patient manner
it's gonna be alright
little boy, don't cry, not tonight
golds and reds will blend together in this balancing act
leaves will shed and be replaced again
as the seasons pass
will these colours ever last?
what makes one so driven to follow their path?
why can't I be like that?
I am slow and steady as a tightrope walker
but the wire's gonna snap
i'm just throwing time away
every
single
day
all i want is to freely revel in this beautiful life
but the darkness that's been welling up within is hard to hide
golds and reds will blend together in this balancing act
leaves will shed and be replaced again
as the seasons pass
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